In every mythological arc there is a moment where the protagonist must lose everything ( descending into the darkness and roots of things and underworld cave or womb ) in order to be reborn : it's become a cliche , but the liminal stage in alchemy where all traditions once served with reverence and devotion become dogmatic obligation and duty , is a normal chapter in the hero's journey . This is never a bad thing , but when observed from above - is a simple pattern and stage in the integration of self .
When we are children , our innocence and purity of imagination and creative embodiment hold no hindrances , conditions , boundaries , or judgement . As a child , I was Princess Gaga and when my mother took me to dance class at 4 , I proudly introduced myself as this because that's whom I was . This defiance - or brazen impudence - found in children is what allows these beautiful pure creatures to exist in a realm between veils ; the world of imagination - from which all reality is rooted in . Anything within our physical reality including myth of self , identity , roles , stories we live through - is a direct result of our sub and unconscious belief systems . Through feeling ( inner and outer ) we embody these beliefs externally then projected onto the 3d screen of life .
Many times there is dissonance within this bridge : a chord that is out of tune , a key or note unsupported or alone for each of our unique Soul-songs ...
This happens when the pure innocent childlike wonder is stinted , betrayed through revealing that it was all a lie , or told it is wrong .
When my mother witnessed me introducing myself as Princess Gaga - she didn't correct me and tell me no , she smiled and said , "yes this is Gabrielle , and she is Princess Gaga" - in this way , she acknowledged my reality and wisdom , while also gently introducing me to the reality I was now living into : Gabrielle .
Similarly , when I found out Santa Claus was possibly not real - I spoke to my mother and she gently told me , that he was and is real within me and her and my father , even if he wasn't physically present , his spirit is real . That was all I needed and I never let go then of my imaginative beliefs - instead , I knew life was much bigger than the structural cage I was born into- it was simply a costume I wore during the day and stripped away at night : in this way I learned to swim through life as a waking dream my Soul was experiencing and my mind witnessing . I learned how not to then be attached to the changing iteration of self : for it was not real - just makeup my imagination ( Soul ) wanted played out . Serious play . Everything became fun then , light , joyful - because the physical body was a magnificent tool and temple full of sensory antennae ( taste , sight , smell , memory , emotion , digestion , touch , etc ) that allowed my imagination to fully experience and embody my dreams : blossom .
I believe all is possible :
My father and mother taught me this . My father through health of physical body and how we are all made of energy ( Sproutman ) . My mother through radical esoteric intellect and wisdom of mind .
I believe at times - if we look beyond the mundane , contemporary , or outdated structural framework of societal beliefs artificially injected into us , we can find the golden glue that connects and binds us back into wholeness and integration of self . Our shadows and the difficult stories we experience in life are normal stages of the integration process and hero's journey ( Joseph Campbell ) - by losing what we know innately , we return to it with adult consciousness and awareness and compassion . It is the figure 8. The lemniscate . The knot is the crux : the crux is the way to bend on through ..
To suffer or experience loss and sacrifice is to have compassion - com(with)- passion (suffer with) another (self). By losing it - we return to it ... it's that simple - though incredibly abstract and only really makes sense in living through it ...
I left the roots of my family because I needed to have perspective on this beautiful origin story . I took up smoking in Paris , ate pasta and drank red wine , I turned the world into my textbook and the interweb into my imagination . By divorcing myself from my roots - I discovered perspective on the proverbial elephant that is life - I also found disease , fear , anxiety , comparison , judgement , false borders , lunacy . This is important . By brushing up against these callous states - I returned to my essence - because the costumes felt constricting , tight , false , heavy ... but with a new awareness different than I had in childhood - a wisdom that can only come through compassion of self and other : forgiveness - and thus - change .
Sometimes , living into false narratives was never false . It was just a stage in development of the arc in the myth of self .
When others in our outside reality cannot accept ours or the natural progression in development of self — it often means our time with them has past ; for they do not love or see us as we are now — only as a static figure of their own perception or past ....
Hate or an inability to accept change - is simply "love in dissonance : distorted" ( Rupert Spira ) - it is the desire to have that which it labels with fear or non acceptance .
When we embrace that which we fear or hate , transcendence occurs : because the realisation is always that it is already within and so no need of external validation exists ... that's when everything changes
I burned this painting .
Why ? Because , by letting go of the vessel for the mythic archetype I had found - taking away its pedestal - I was able to integrate its beauty within me and change , now charged . Through this act , the mythic creature returned to me : snake rising - shedding skins - integrating itself into renewed wholeness ..
“Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks, but bears it out even to the edge of doom” Shakespeare. Sonnet 116
#stayalien
Written 5 May 2025
